As for the true stars of the hotel, the Bijou offered up two young ladies for these parts. First, there was the lovely Erica, the friendly young brunette who chit-chatted with all the guests in her customary white waitress’s outfit at breakfast and in her more formal black attire for dinner. She was a hit with all, especially the German men, and skillfully played the role of Faulty Towers’ seductive Polly.

Then there was Silvia, who completed the quartet and played the role of Manuel. A whiz serving breakfast and dinner delicacies enlisting the classic two-upturned-spoon technique, Silvia greeted guests each day with a different haircut and what appeared to be a new or newly placed piercing. Silvia’s fashion statements seemed to echo the overall theme of the Bijou, for though they were always just slightly amiss, they were at all times strangely warm and appealing.

That being said, no matter how wonderful the staff, it is the masterpieces that emerge from the kitchen of the Hotel Bijou that guests remember most. And after nearly a week’s meals, I left believing that the term "la cucina tipica valdostana" truly meant, "tastes like tuna."

While tuna seemed to be the flavor del viaggio, other Bijou culinary highlights worthy of note included the daringly-undercooked pinwheel sausage, the fondue which turned out to literally be a two-pound pot o’cheese and nothing else, the famed fresh local trout, which must have hiked from the mountain lake two miles away to the Bijou’s kitchen to have acquired so aged a flavor, served with golden mayonnaise, and perhaps most entertaining of all, the mystery meat, which on the menu that had been penned in Italian, German, and English began its journey as agnelli, and ended up on my platter as pork. These culinary encounters helped to bond Bijou guests together, and as an Italian dining partner was able to convey to me despite our distinct language barrier, “With enough wine – even not-so-good wine – the food is perfectly edible!”

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